She looks down. Down at his still, lifeless body. A gentle breeze blows her hair, ever so slightly, enough to see the pain pouring down her face. She falls to her knees, to his side. A shaky hand reaches out, wanting to caress his still warm face, instead it consoles her broken heart. She holds herself, falling to pieces and closes her eyes.

She opens her eyes. It's morning, 6am. The sun starting to peak through the blinds.

"I can't keep doing this," she thought to herself. She wipes the tears from her face, breathes deeply, rolls to her side. She watches his chest rise and fall, each breath deep and peaceful. The dream had not disturbed him.

The decision is made. She collects her clothes and a small box from the bedside table, filled with meaningless items to anyone else. She looks down, at his still, sleeping body, one last time before she turns and walks away, one last time. She can't lose him again, not one more time. She dies each time, awakens to know it will happen and she can't keep going.

To not lose him, she lets him go. It breaks her heart, tears her up inside, but she is comforted knowing that he will never be taken from her again.

Word

neck·ces·so·ry /ækˈsɛsəri/ Show Spelled [nek-ses-uh-ree] noun

1. an article or set of articles of dress, like a scarf, that adds completeness, convenience, attractiveness, etc., to one's basic outfit, worn around or near the neck

This might be the best word invention I've ever had. That's right, I'm taking credit for it. It came up in a conversation regarding the appropriate attire for penguins. You could ask, but do you really want to know?

I forgot to use my new word in a sentence, you know, like spellers always ask for, so here goes:

Q: "Do you think Penguins would wear bowties or just regular ties?"
A: "No, no, no, Penguins are cool enough without a neckcessary! Seriously, think about it!"

Ok, that's 3 sentences, but I really felt that it needed them.

~Bean

Thought:

With the right story telling, you will always be the villain in someone else's movie.

When it all catches up to you...

4 countries, 2 continents and 16 hours of travel later, I returned from Sweden this Wednesday afternoon. It was a whirlwind trip, as most of my travel seems to be. I landed in Sweden on Saturday night, without my luggage. That was fun, nothing makes travel more fun that flying all day and night, only to be left with nothing to change into the next day. Luckily, a coworker of mine is the exact same size as me and brought me some extra clothes. My luggage did arrive eventually, on Monday evening, just in time for me to leave Tuesday night. At least I got to look good for the last day and a half of the trip.

Sweden: Far enough away to mess up the internal clock, short enough trip to not adjust fully, back in town dragging my ass through the rest of the week.

I played the last hockey game of the season on Wednesday night, I don't know where I got the energy for it. I even scored a goal on my first shift. I think I set the bar too high because I did nothing worth mentioning for the rest of the game. We lost, in OT, the championship went to the most hated team in the league, which makes it sting that much more. We got over it shortly after with pitchers of beer and a variety of pub food.

I don't think the jet lag hit me until Friday night. I was getting ready to head to the gym (I've recently take up running), and I thought I would wait out the crowd for about an hour. I made the mistake of laying down to watch some TV, then all of the sudden it was 10am the next morning. I can't remember the last time I slept for 16 hours in one night. I guess I was tired.

You would think the weekend would be the best time to relax and chill out, but while I was traveling 10,000 miles around the world, I missed 4 birthdays at work and another one this Sunday. My weekend is full of baking. Cupcakes, lemon tarts, a 40th birthday cake and a fourth dessert that I haven't figured out yet. What else could go with the other three desserts? I almost feel like I should offer a healthy treat to balance out all the sweets, but it's a birthday. There's no room for carrot sticks and broccoli next to cake and lemon tarts. That would just be weird.

On top of all the baking, I'm trying to piece together the ruins of my aunt's patio cushions in an attempt to make her new ones. I guess 'patio cushions' isn't the right description. They are really the seat cushions to a swing that she has on her patio. Having never seen what the cushions looked like before, it's hard to envision how all these pieces are supposed to go together. The really hard part to figure out was the padding. Instead of the seat portion just being one single piece of foam, it's three. One really long one and two that are half the size. The long one sandwiches the smaller ones to hold them together. Personally, I think one thick piece would have been the better way to go. In fact, it completely baffles me as why it isn't just one thick piece. Three pieces just causes me to readjust over and over again to get it all straight and flat. I will never understand why people make things so difficult....

So after a whirlwind trip, I have a whirlwind weekend. I'm aiming for next weekend to relax...

BTW - Happy May!

~Bean